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Tigerbomb13

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I don't have children, so I probably don't understand the effect of social media on them.  Hasn't there always been bad influences on children? There has always been bullies and bad influences.  When I was a kid, I used to wander around outside all day and some of my friends definitely were not good influences.  In one case, my parents forbid me from seeing the family next door anymore.  In later generations, people talked about the evils of music, tv and video games.  It seems like whatever is happening today is believed to be worse than anything before it and it's going to destroy our young generation.  It seems to me like young people today are nicer and smarter than they were when I was young, so where is the terrible influence?  

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Another reason get that militia well regulated:

Quote

Americans who have fired 1,000 rounds or more face three times the rate of hearing loss as those who have never fired a weapon, according to an analysis of 2011 and 2012 observations from the National Health and Nutrition Examination Survey. It’s a bit lower once you adjust for age and other factors — probably closer to 1.8 times the rate. .

https://www.washingtonpost.com/business/2024/02/09/hearing-loss-republicans/

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9 hours ago, Tiger337 said:

I don't have children, so I probably don't understand the effect of social media on them.  Hasn't there always been bad influences on children? There has always been bullies and bad influences.  When I was a kid, I used to wander around outside all day and some of my friends definitely were not good influences.  In one case, my parents forbid me from seeing the family next door anymore.  In later generations, people talked about the evils of music, tv and video games.  It seems like whatever is happening today is believed to be worse than anything before it and it's going to destroy our young generation.  It seems to me like young people today are nicer and smarter than they were when I was young, so where is the terrible influence?  

one example, kids at my daughters school were trashing the bathrooms because of a challenge on tick tock 

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14 hours ago, Biff Mayhem said:

My kids only have one social media account (on Discord) where they have a group chat of their nerd friends. We don't do facebook, twitter, snapchat, tiktok or insta. In fact, when I told them they couldn't use tiktok anymore when it was taken over by the commies, there was a brief "you hate me" response but they eventually came to understand the "why".

I wish you the best.   My buddy's daughter got herself into trouble bullying over Discord, she was also sending hentai porn to the person she was bullying.  She was 11 at the time.

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48 minutes ago, pfife said:

I wish you the best.   My buddy's daughter got herself into trouble bullying over Discord, she was also sending hentai porn to the person she was bullying.  She was 11 at the time.

My next door neighbor showed me magazine porn when I was about 10. 

His brother wanted me to come with him to his friends house because he knew a girl that would give me a BJ.  I think my father overheard that one and that might have been why he wouldn't let me see them anymore.  They actually weren't bullies.  I don't think they knew they were doing anything wrong.  They had neglectful parents and every kid in the family stayed back at least once.   The exception was the youngest one.  All the older brothers were super protective of her.  It was an interesting family.  

Edited by Tiger337
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21 minutes ago, Tiger337 said:

My next door neighbor showed me magazine porn when I was about 10. 

His brother wanted me to come with him to his friends house because he knew a girl that would give me a BJ.  I think my father overheard that one and that might have been why he wouldn't let me see them anymore.  They actually weren't bullies.  I don't think they knew they were doing anything wrong.  They had neglectful parents and every kid in the family stayed back at least once.   The exception was the youngest one.  All the older brothers were super protective of her.  It was an interesting family.  

Ok

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9 hours ago, pfife said:

I wish you the best.   My buddy's daughter got herself into trouble bullying over Discord, she was also sending hentai porn to the person she was bullying.  She was 11 at the time.

I peeked in on it recently and it was mostly them and their nerd friends sharing their art and pictures of their cats. I do need to be more diligent about it for sure but I am comforted knowing that all of their friends, save for one, are level headed kids with good parents. The one that worries me is a school only friend and we have effectively and stealthly limited the interactions to that.

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9 hours ago, pfife said:

You should let all parents abd principals know they have nothing to worry about.   It's too bad you didn't googlr for all of them earlier

I hate bullies and parents that enable them even more.  You guys are protecting your kids because you are responsibile parents.  I understand that, but bullies were around before social media and they always had ways to terrorize or influence other kids.  They do the same as adults and many of them bully their way into influential positons in society.  They always have.  

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As was mentioned earlier it's the pervasiveness that is different now.   When we were kids, if you got bullied at school you went home and didn't get bullied anymore until the next day.    Now, you go home, and it continues online.      Perhaps even worse than in person.   If a parent thinks "keep them off social media" protects their child, it doesn't - the bullying doesn't stop just b/c the victim doesn't see it b/c they're not allowed on the website.    That decision could be unilateral disarming which has a whole host of other implications.

 

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3 minutes ago, Tiger337 said:

I hate bullies and parents that enable them even more.  You guys are protecting your kids because you are responsibile parents.  I understand that, but bullies were around before social media and they always had ways to terrorize or influence other kids.  They do the same as adults and many of them bully their way into influential positons in society.  They always have.  

Today bullies have a lot more tools at their disposal, like exponentially more, and the impact is exponentially broader.  Back then the worst thing that could happen were isolated and contained for the most part.  Now it's permanent and available for everybody to see.  

Think of the worst you were ever embarassed or shamed as a kid being bullied.  Now imagine there's a video of it and everybody at the school saw it and shared it and laughed at it and can do that anytime they want.  That's the challenges parents of younger kids face today that I, even 10 years ago, didn't face to the same degree.

 

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If everybody is laughing at the videos, that is a bigger problem than bullying.  I hope parents teach their children not to laugh at bullying videos and to be good people.  Unfortunately kids and adults like bullies which is why we have so many bullies as political leaders.  

Edited by Tiger337
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There are parents that do, but many do not.   They either don't know that their kid is doing it (same problem as with parents protecting children from content), they don't care that their kid is doing it (or have learned helplessness), or they want their kid to do it.   But those well meaning parents are also struggling against a troll/bully culture that is strongly fostered and encouraged by social media 

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You all know I live in Dearborn.  Large middle eastern population, which means a large non English speaking population.  My son's middle school also had a lot of kids bussed in from the east side of town due to crowding issues.

My son got in a lot of trouble in middle school.  At least once a week we were called.  Great. We raised a bad kid.  That was our thought.  Nothing was really that bad that he did, he wasn't a bully or anything.  Just being an average 12 year old I guess.

We get to high school and the first parent teacher conference happens and I ask the teacher how his behavior was.  He looked puzzled and said "He's fine, he's great.  No issues"

Then I concluded that the administrators had to call 'someone' when kids were being kids in middle school and since we spoke English and were likely to come in and "talk" that we got designated as the parents to do that with.   It was easier for them rather than call a house with broken English, if at all, across town, with no way often to even get to the school.  The admins had to check off their boxes on discipline and we were the lucky family.

I'm just sharing that as an anecdote, not in the context of what many here are facing. 

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As someone who was bullied a lot in school growing up, from around 7th grade through 11th grade, I am thankful there was not social media at the time. I certainly feel it would have made the bullying worse for me back then. However, in my experience, it is not true that the bullying stopped when you went home. When the bullies know your home phone number would prank call your house and make sexually explicit phone calls about having sex with your mom or other sexually explicit acts, that was bullying after school. When they'd call you just to mock the sound of your voice over the phone and then hang up real quick, that was bullying after school. 

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When I was in high school I got bullied at home by kids from a high school that I didn't even go to. It was probably more intimidation than bullying. If I would walk down the street and they were playing basketball, I would have to walk down another street. They would sit on my parents car while it was parked in the street. They would make sexual gestures towards my sister. It was to the point where I just hung out in a different neighborhood. Going to school was getting away from the bullies. 

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7 hours ago, Mr.TaterSalad said:

As someone who was bullied a lot in school growing up, from around 7th grade through 11th grade, I am thankful there was not social media at the time. I certainly feel it would have made the bullying worse for me back then. However, in my experience, it is not true that the bullying stopped when you went home. When the bullies know your home phone number would prank call your house and make sexually explicit phone calls about having sex with your mom or other sexually explicit acts, that was bullying after school. When they'd call you just to mock the sound of your voice over the phone and then hang up real quick, that was bullying after school. 

I was very quiet, so I got semi-bullied frequently.  It never went too far though.  I think I never gave the fear response they wanted.   I saw others get bullied a lot worse.  In a way, social media might have been better for some people because they could get back at them if they were clever.  

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15 hours ago, Tiger337 said:

I was very quiet, so I got semi-bullied frequently.  It never went too far though.  I think I never gave the fear response they wanted.   I saw others get bullied a lot worse.  In a way, social media might have been better for some people because they could get back at them if they were clever.  

I had a medical issue leading to a behavioral issue and went to special ed for first and second grades, so you can imagine how popular I was after I was declared “cured” and mainstreamed directly into third grade at the local school without any guided onboarding, attending alongside the same kids who already knew all my issues. I got a bit of a break when my parents (my mom actually) sent me to Catholic school starting in fourth grade, probably to avoid being bussed into Detroit schools, which was a huge fear among the Greatest Generation at the time. I still exhibited remnants of my earlier experience, though, and started getting bullied there, too, all the way into ninth grade in high school.

The way I got out of it was I started smoking pot and embedded myself with the burnouts in the school’s smoking area. Nerds and geeks and dorks and dweebs got bullied, but burnouts in the smoking area did not. That whole thing turned out to be a bad detour and I didn’t completely straighten up until I got halfway through (my third) college, but at least I didn’t get pushed around by the jocks during the final three years of high school.

The social media of the time was the rumor mill, and even if they didn’t have pics or vids, it was vivid enough for us to completely immobilize many of us socially.

 

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